Breastfeeding is often hailed as the gold standard for infant nutrition, with numerous health organizations recommending it as the ideal way to nourish newborns. The benefits, such as providing essential nutrients, strengthening the immune system, fostering mother-child bonding, and supporting food security are well-documented. However, the intense pressure placed on mothers to breastfeed can sometimes overshadow the fact that it may not be the best option for every family.
One of the primary pressures comes from the pervasive messaging that “breast is best.” This phrase, while well-intentioned, can make mothers who struggle with breastfeeding feel inadequate. “The societal expectation that all mothers should be able to breastfeed effortlessly is unrealistic and can lead to feelings of guilt and failure," says Sarah Rieber, DNP APN-C IBCLC Women’s Health Nurse Practitioner and Lactation Consultant at RWJBarnabas Health. “Not every mother has the same physical or emotional capacity to breastfeed, and that's perfectly okay.”
For many mothers, the physical challenges of breastfeeding can be daunting. These physical challenges are often what lead a mother to decide against breastfeeding. The CDC reports that although most infants receive some breast milk, most are not exclusively breastfeeding or continuing to breastfeed as long as recommended.
Issues such as low milk supply, mastitis, and nipple pain are common but often under-discussed. These challenges can leave mothers feeling disappointed and overwhelmed with themselves and their bodies every time they feed. This sentiment is far too common, highlighting the need for a more nuanced conversation around infant feeding.
Breastfeeding can also place significant demands on a mother’s time and energy. One Forbes author did the math, estimating that a year of breastfeeding equates to about 1,800 hours. That’s almost as many hours as a 40-hour work week.
The expectation to be the sole provider of nutrition can be exhausting, especially for those juggling multiple responsibilities, including work and other children. “As the math points out, breastfeeding is a full-time job in itself,” notes Sarah. “For working mothers or those with other demanding obligations, exclusively breastfeeding can be incredibly challenging and stressful.”
The emotional toll of breastfeeding should also not be underestimated. Postpartum depression and anxiety are exacerbated by the pressures to conform to breastfeeding ideals. Mental health is a crucial aspect of postpartum care and for some mothers, the pressure to breastfeed can negatively impact their mental well-being, making it essential to consider alternatives that support both the mother, child and family.
It’s also important to recognize that some mothers simply choose not to breastfeed for personal reasons, and this choice deserves respect. Whether due to lifestyle preferences, medical conditions, or personal comfort, the decision not to breastfeed is valid. Respecting and supporting a mother’s decision, whatever it may be, is crucial for her well-being and that of her baby.
Ultimately, the best feeding option is one that supports both the mother and the baby. Formula feeding is a safe and viable alternative that ensures infants receive the necessary nutrients to grow and thrive. The priority should always be the health and happiness of both the mother and the child. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, and it’s important to provide mothers with the information and support they need to make the best decision for their family.
While breastfeeding offers numerous benefits, it is not the best option for every mother. Recognizing and respecting the diverse needs and circumstances of mothers can help alleviate the pressures they face and promote a more supportive and inclusive approach to infant feeding.
Curious to know more about breastfeeding? Visit https://www.rwjbh.org/treatment-care/breastfeeding/ for a brief Q&A addressing common questions.